Stress Satire


Students across the country are more stressed out than ever. Social media, sports, and other activities can make life very stressful for students and some are struggling to handle it. (Photo in public domain)

It is almost common knowledge at this point that teens are the most stressed-out people on the planet. With all of the homework, after school activities, social status, and preparations for college, nobody can compete. All their parents can do is empathize with them because not even the adults are as stressed as teens. Award-winning psychologist Jamie Jones conducted several experiments on teens and their stress levels: “This generation of teens is so stressed out it made my tester blow a fuse,” said Jones. This sheer amount of stress can lead to mental health problems such as anxiety and depression.

Hunter Wade is one of many stressed-out teenagers living as a seventeen-year-old senior in high school. Wade is one of the most popular kids at school and with that comes a lot of stress. “Every morning I wake up and I have to scroll through all of my social media apps like Instagram, Snapchat, and Tik Tok, to make sure I am always keeping up with the latest trends,” said Wade. 

Wade is under a lot of stress in attempts to maintain his social status.

Being forced to balance his superior follower count and popularity with the other stresses of his honors-level classes is simply too much to handle. On a daily basis, Wade has mental breakdowns. Wade will cry and cry and cry, but he has to post a video on social media of him crying, because it is an event in his life so obviously he has to record it, which just makes him cry even more. “If I don’t post anything on social media of me crying, people will unfollow me because I have a superiority complex,” Said Wade.

Because of his duties as a social media star and honors-level student, Wade has almost no free time. “Every afternoon I spend hours flipping through the funny videos on Tik Tok and then retweeting them on Twitter, so everyone knows what a great sense of humor I have. However, I never have any time for homework because I’m working so hard on my social media status,” said Wade. With all of these stresses, it’s crazy how active Wade is on social media, he is able to post all of the time and his 700 followers simply adore him.

Sabrina Wilkens is a sophomore in high school, argues that she is way more stressed out than Hunter Wade. “I have Volleyball practice three times a week. That is three hours of straight volleyball and taxing physical activity per week,” said Wilkens. 

Wilkens is on the Junior Varsity team at her school and is looking to make varsity her senior year. 

With all of the Volleyball practices and games Wilkens has to participate in, it leaves her with a lot less time to do homework and other activities that she needs to get done every night. However, Wilkens also needs time to spend on social media and to just relax. In turn, Wilkens is staying up extra late at night and is getting less sleep than she should be. 

Lack of sleep, pressure in sports, and homework piling up has led to an immense amount of stress for Wilkens. All of this stress is really taking a toll on Wilkens, “I feel like I’m burnt out, I don’t want to continue to strive with all of this stress anymore,” said Wilkens. “All I want to do is be able to sit on my phone all day and not worry about school, is that so much to ask for?” said Wilkens.

Lissa Johnson is a very highly achieving student. As a junior, she is taking almost all AP classes this semester and always earns straight A’s. 

“I don’t understand what all of this hullabaloo is about stress. I just get home and do my homework and I have plenty of time to play on my phone and relax afterwards before I go to bed,” said Johnson. Johnson is not stressed out about school at all whatsoever, even though she is in the hardest classes.

The reason Johnson is not stressed, however, is because she does nothing other than school. “I know Lissa — she’s weird, all she does is go home and do her homework. Of course she isn’t as stressed as me, she doesn’t have a social media presence, she doesn’t play any sports, she doesn’t do anything of value after school,” said Wilkens. 

Because Johnson does not have any other important extracurriculars, she does not have to deal with the stress that comes with them. People who do, however, have to deal with all of the stresses they can bring like Wilkens and Wade. 

Johnson, however, argues that if students would just sit down and do their homework and not worry about social media, they would not be so stressed. “I understand why someone would play a sport, but social media is supposed to be a fun leisurely thing not something that causes stress,” said Johnson. 

However, her shallow opinions about the importance of social media are not shared with other students. 

Students all across the country are more stressed out than ever. Being forced to balance the stresses that come with social media, sports, and other extracurriculars is very difficult. One can only hope that the next generation will not be as stressed out as the current generation is.


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