I was six years old. My brother and I were sitting in the living room watching “The Wiggles” and eating Poptarts. My brother finished his before me and took my Poptart and ate mine too! I did what any normal six year old would do; I bit him. I vividly remember my parents making me say, “I’m sorry.” Did I sincerely mean that apology? Of course not.
What makes an apology sincere?
“I think it is important that the person apologizing is completely honest and speaks from the heart. A text or a Facebook message won’t do; they have to care enough to talk to you in person. It is much harder to apologize in person,” Courtney Elyard, sophomore, said.
Sometimes, when we are forced to apologize to someone, we don’t necessarily mean it. The fact that a person is forced to apologize means he or she wouldn’t have done it on their own by definition.
“Whenever I am mean to my little sister, my mom always makes me apologize. I don’t really understand why though, because we all know I don’t mean it,” Kaleigh Thompson, sophomore, said.
Regardless of whether or not the apology is meaningful, people generally expect and desire an apology. Perhaps the reason we like to be apologized to is because it makes us feel better and it’s easier to forgive the person apologizing.
“If you feel like the person apologizing is truly sorry, it’s easier to forgive them and think they’re still a good person. If someone does something to you and doesn’t have any remorse, it can change your opinion about them durastically,” Mrs. Beaver, science teacher, said.
The purpose of an apology is to admit a wrongdoing and ask for forgiveness. To do that sincerely is always the best way to go.
Sarah, I share your opinion that apologies must come from the heart to be sincere. However, speaking from a parent standpoint, one of the ways you teach your children to do things is by repeatedly telling them what to do in certain situations – “say thank you, say excuse me, say please, say you are sorry”, etc. As we continually remind our children what to do, the actions then become traits. When this becomes a trait, then you have a choice as a child/person whether or not to act in those situations but the knowledge that you should act is ingrained. Now whenever you do someone wrong I hope you at least think about whether or not you should apologize. That is the key. If you feel that you have done someone wrong, I have a feeling you will apologize.