Wed. Sep 22nd, 2021
Adam Baker with an expertly turtled backpack. The average turtling takes about one minute.

    With ninja like stealth and lightning fast hand movements, many Leesville students are attempting a new fad: turtling. Turtling is a practical joke that is sure to occupy the long, boredom filled hours of the school day.
    According to urbandictionary.com, turtling is “the act of taking one’s backpack, emptying the contents, flipping the backpack inside-out, putting the contents back in, and zipping the backpack up.”
    The most opportune time to turtle a classmate is usually when he or she is zoned out or paying close attention to the teacher.
     Simon Burke, junior, is one of many individuals who partake in this comical antic, he is very vocal when it comes to turtling. “I love turtling kids. It’s so funny when they have to walk down the halls with their backpack in hand because they don’t have time to unturtle their backpack.”
    Meg Milan, Zarek Stafford–all juniors–and Simon Burke consider themselves a “turtling team.”
     “We turtle anywhere from 100 to 300 backpacks everyday,” said Stafford.
    “The most backpacks we’ve ever turtled in one day is 377,” stated Milan.
    The team does not believe in counting repeats. “If someone is stupid enough to get turtled twice, they don’t deserve to be counted,” said Milan.
     Robbie Allison, junior, has somewhat of a different view on turtling than the turtling team. “I prefer to work alone,” said Allison. “My Asian background and ancient oriental ancestral tree provide me with the skill set I need to be a successful turtler,” said Allison.   
    The reaction of the turtlees is by far the best reward for a successful turtle. “One time this kid just raged for 30 straight minutes. That was my favorite turtle ever,” said Burke.
    Evan Riley, junior, has been turtled countless times since the school year started. “I need to stop falling asleep in class. I just can’t get away from it. Every time I turn around, my backpack is turtled,” said Riley.
    Many students feel that this craze is completely inappropriate and not in the least bit funny. Those students are usually the ones getting turtled, so obviously they are not tickled by this entertaining joke.
    The most elite turtler’s in the Leesville area are currently training for the addition of “Speed Turtling,” to the 2014 Olympics in Sochi, Russia.
    Watch your backpacks Leesville students!

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